Wanstead and Snaresbrook Cricket Club

Scorecard

Chelmer Vets CC v Wanstead and Snaresbrook Cricket Club Over 40's Indoor Team on Thu 07 Jan 2016 at 9pm
Wanstead and Snaresbrook Cricket Club Won by 6 wickets

Match report Okay...its taken a week of thinking about what to write, what to write that you would believe. I have come to the conclusion that even if you think that what you read further on in this report can only be fiction. I can only say that all of it is what I can recollect from the match. I was not under the influence of anything, but what happened in parts of this win you are more likely to find in a Looney Toons Script than in the hallowed hall in Chelmsford.

Right the BS...oops sorry the tales the Over 40's final round robin fixture v Chelmer vets.

We start off by offering thanks to a gentlemen named Baber, who kindly stood in for a member who is off on a jolly to Singapore. This member knew how important this fixture was, but didn't bat an eyelid. Just booked his ticket for a jolly without thinking of the consequences. Anyway, I am very happy to say that Baber was brilliant and the player on the jolly was only missed because we could not shout at Baber. Anyway, thank you Baber.

To the match. We begin as usual in the dressing room. All of us bar JC were changing into the appropriate attire, mulling over what we should do if we win the toss. We decide that should we win the toss we will bat. JC comes into the dressing room, "right lads we are bowling", we are shout at JC saying that "he cant win the toss with a double headed coin". When over the yells he announces that he won the toss and chose to bowl. The dressing room erupts. For two reasons, firstly, JC hadn't listened to the other 5 Captains in the team and secondly, more importantly we all had our pads on and were deciding the batting order and so had to waste valuable energy (we are older people who are up past 9pm. Our energy levels are dodgy during the day let alone when the sun goes down). After much huffing and puffing we traipse out into the hall and continue to barrack JC. Well, what happened next, will astound you. The opening over, the keeper catches three bowls. (What the keeper catches and dismisses three of the opposition?...Ed). Err no Ed, the keeper stops three balls from hitting the back wall. On the third catch , Wanstead went wild. This had never happened before. Had there been a camera available, we would have taken a group photo with the batsman who played and missed. So, JC got a maiden over, but the plaudits go to the keeper.

Next over goes to Fayyaz, awful fielder, but great bowler. (There has to be a reason to select him) Fayyaz does these things with his fingers that spins the ball that surprises the batsman as well as the keeper and all the other poor sods on the field. JC reckons hes got it worked out, we all think hes pretending. He may well be the leading run score in the history of the Shepherd Neame Essex league, but that means nothing to us. Forgot to add that Fayyaz is the leading wicket taker in the same league, but that also means nothing to us. They're playing with the old boys now. They have to know they are the same as the others. Old boys playing cricket, no more no less. Back to the match. Fayyaz bowls a ball, nothing special it appears. Anyway the ball finds a thick edge and pops up to Ibrahim. A dolly catch we think, as his hands are around the ball. But wait a minute, the ball is back in the air, and Ib is trying to catch the dropping ball. through slow motion we see Ib try and fail three times to catch the ball. The keeper offers Ib his gloves, the others ask how much he was paid. After a prelonged period of barracking, where the opposition also engaged in the "conversation" and the umpires chuckled a bit,the over returns. The last delivery of the over, another innocuous one, sees the batsman prod again and the ball spins of towards Baber. We all thought he was never going to catch it. It was in front of him very low down, not a chance. Well Baber, pulled out of the top drawer an amazing catch. We were stunned, then elated, someone had held a catch. We aren't used to players holding on to catches, including the amazing keeper.

There was two more special moments in this innings that are worth reporting. The first involves a strategic decision made by the keeper. (Strategic decision?? Ah this is the BS you referred to earlier...Ed). Let the description speak for itself and then you can decide. Lordy bowls a special one, the batsman plays and misses. The keeper catches the ball and tries to run out the player. This is were the confusion/strategy kicks in. The keeper hears the player shouting so begins to run down the wicket to pass the ball to run out the non batting player. Unknown to his left the other batsman is running with the keeper and so the players are calling for the ball to return. The ball gets thrown to the bowler and the nobody is run out. The keeper realizes the faux pas, or does he. Is this a very strategic decision to keep a batsman who's not scoring any runs but not getting out at the striker end? This tale will be told for the next few years, but the keeper will maintain that it was a great strategic play by him. And I'm sticking with that one and not what the other players were shouting, horrible things like "bung taker". This was not helped when the batsman in question says he will give me the money owed later. However, we must move on. The overs were being got through, wickets weren't falling but runs were also very short on the ground. That was until the eighth over, where Baber bowls and the ball travels the JC at long off. He collects it sees the striker trying to take a single, hes half way down the pitch and it tolod NO by his partner and is waiting to be run out. All JC had to do was throw the ball to the keeper who is standing over the stumps waiting to receive the throw. But no, JC decides to run to the stumps, I repeat RUN (just to clear up any confusion). Right, just to make things clear, the batsman is half way down the pitch JC has the ball in his hand at the other end of the hall. The batsman has 11 yards to run and JC has 30. Well we can guess who won? there were no run outs here. But the match was held up because all the players on the field including the opposition off the field and the umpires had to take ten minutes to stop laughing. More entertainment from the Wanstead Over 40's. The Chelmer innings ends with only three wicket down and 37 runs on the total. So overall, not a bad effort. This is where we add that Matloob waasn't missed, again. So the team traipses off to the dressing room to prepare to bat.

Captain JC says to Captain Ramon "where do you want to bat?" "Seven" is yelled back, okay message received and understood. It's obvious that there is a batting order change taking place, the lowest are being asked to open. No, the tail is knackered and wants to score. So Ibrahim and Lordy are elected to No 1 and 2. When that is announced, the whole team pads up. Nah we had faith and belief and took to the viewing part of the hall for the players and scorers. Ibrahim and Alan, did not let the team down. They were savage in their playing. Sixes and fours were hit with grace and brute force. One straight six almost took out the umpire and bowler. Four overs of runs flew by and the Wanstead 6 return victorious and into the Semi Finals of the league they progress to. Well done boys. We head back to Chelmsford on the 21st of January. Win or lose boys, its been great fun, so well done!

Chelmer Vets CC Batting
Player name RunsMB4s6sSR
extras
TOTAL :
 
for 3 wickets
0
37 (10.0 overs)		     
   
   
   
   
   
   

Wanstead and Snaresbrook Cricket Club Over 40's Indoor Team Bowling

Player NameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
No records to display.

Wanstead and Snaresbrook Cricket Club Over 40's Indoor Team Batting
Player Name RMB4s6sSRCatchesStumpingsRun outs
extras
TOTAL :
 
for 0 wickets
0
38		        
Ramon Chesney  
A.N. Other  
John Chambers  
Ibrahim Aziz  
Alan Lord  
M. Fayyaz Khan  

Chelmer Vets CC Bowling

Player nameOversMaidensRunsWicketsAverageEconomy
No records to display.